so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
