I want to have your abortion
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
