your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
These tits shall not be calmed
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
