let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
