STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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