he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
