Can i not drive my cunt home
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
