well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
