just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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