Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize