I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
