i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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