What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
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