Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
