is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
i out mim tonsoeep
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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