i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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