I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
