You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
