we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I wish i was in the wii world.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Can vaginas get frostbite?
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize