i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
