ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
