i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
