Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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