Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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