Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
