I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
