Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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