it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
