Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
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