One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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