I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
