I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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