I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
