Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
