Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
