Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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