And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
