he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
