Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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