Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize