you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
