i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
