his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
