Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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