Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
