Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
