You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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