think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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