the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I AM VODKA MAN
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
