We're facebook friends in real life
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
