It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
